Friday, September 19, 2008

Would you go back?

The building I work in has a little deli on the first floor. I stop in every morning for a Diet Coke (that I was supposed to stop drinking, shhh) and usually some eggs of some sort. There are 3 ladies that work there, and have since forever. Well, my forever which equals the one year I've been in this building.

One of the girls is celebrating a birthday today. She is a ripe old 23. She is young and spunky, full of life and often just plain ole silly. She was saying how she feels like she is getting old and needs to grow up some. I just laughed. At 36, 23 seems like a lifetime ago. I told her to just enjoy it while she can!

On my way up to the office I started thinking about my life at 23. Can it really be 13 years ago?? I don't feel old enough for much of anything in my life to have been that long ago. Similar to the feeling I get when I admit I have a 16 year old son. At 23 I was a single mom. We lived in a tiny 2 bedroom, 1 bath duplex. I'd estimate it was about 700 sq feet. We were happy there, it was always clean and tidy and most meals were eaten at my parents house. Free and no mess, my favorite kind of meals! I made slave wages at a job I really liked and lived pay check to pay check.

Since then, I've moved houses 6 times. I've changed jobs 6 times. I kissed what seemed like a million toads. I met the man of my dreams, lost him, and got him back again. I got married and had 2 more children - not necessarily in that order. I have bought my first home, gone through 2 cars and accumulated debt. I make good money at a job I don't love and I still live paycheck to paycheck lots of the time. I've attended more sporting events, where my offspring were the stars, than I can count.

If I could go back to 23, would I? They were certainly less stressful times. I had time to exercise, I went out with friends, and I got to raise my only son exactly like I wanted to. It was lonely too, looking back on it now. And looking in hind sight it was even kind of boring. One thing I am sure of, life now is NOT boring.

No, I'd not go back, even if I could. Life now is hectic, sometimes down right crazy. This weekend alone we have 6 or 7 ballgames to attend. But it's good, and I don't think I'd change it at all. Well, I'd not refuse a money tree for the back yard, just saying!

Would you go back, and if so to what age?


Heather said...

I might go back to college days for a while just for grins. :) A part-time job, spending money when I wanted it, long lazy weekends and no real responsibilities other than classes to go to? Yeah, it sounds pretty good right now. :)

But really, I wouldn't trade what I've got now for anything. A husband and three beautiful children - nope, it doesn't get any better than that.

Anonymous said...

I don't think I'd go back. I have three great kids, and while I certainly have ups and downs, and of course, regrets about certain things in my life, I wouldn't go back if it meant I wouldn't have what I do now.

It's hard to reflect back to 23, it does seem like a lifetime ago.

Becca said...

My life is crazy right now, but I wouldn't want to go back! Even with all the craziness, I have a lot!! And 23 is a lifetime ago to me!!! HA! That was 10 years ago! Boy am I getting old...

Sammi said...

I have guilt wanting to go back to 23. I love my life now, but loved it back then too! I enjoyed reading every word!

Nikki said...

I wouldn't go back. Like you 23 seems like a lifetime ago (I'm 34) and boy the bumps and wrong turns I've taken over the years...but it's all led me to where I am and that's a good place to be.